10th April 2013
4th Anniversary together today. Happy 4th anniversary. Happy indeed.
What should have been beautiful day has been tainted with such wretchedness and ugliness. The pure light of the day has been defiled by dark poison clouds.
In what way is she attractive enough to seduce him?
My heart keeps screaming that it shouldn't have happened. And that God has totally taken away the only thing that gives me happiness. Why is God so ruthless?
I am trying to reach for help, for someone or something that can take hold of me and drag me away from this terrible pit hole I cannot escape from. I have only sealed the sadness and ache in my heart, and not to dispel it. I don't even know if I have the strength to dispel it.
Are my friends right to tell me I am utterly blinded by love? I have given up trying to speak with my friends. It has reached the point where words no longer communicate aptly what I feel.
I am truly alone in this world. So alone and empty. So alone and bare. It's possibly time to stand up and learn to make decisions for myself and live with it.
But how?
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